


Phan again

by dodo3000



Category: Phan, Phandom
Genre: Angst, Fluff, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-20
Updated: 2015-04-20
Packaged: 2018-03-25 00:10:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,136
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3789400
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dodo3000/pseuds/dodo3000
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Phil longs to have a family but his life is so closely bound to Dan's that he doesn't know what to do.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Phan again

Phil casually laid his feet on Dan’s lap, in front of Dan’s laptop.

“Can you hand me the Maltesers?” Dan asked him while on tumblr and watching TV.

“Sure”, Phil said and threw the bag of chocolates to Dan. In mid-air the bag fell open though, and the Maltesers spread all over the couch.

“Oh no!” Phil laughed. Dan set his laptop aside and laughed as well.

“Oh Phil, I should have known”, he said fondly. Both guys searched the couch and floor until they had found all Maltesers.

“Want to go out for a walk?” Phil asked.

“Sure, why not actually”, Dan replied.

Phil loved having Dan in his life. From the moment they had met, they'd hit it off incredibly well and that had never stopped. In fact, their bond had tightened over the years and they were so close, people even got their names switched up sometimes. What had stopped though, was the kissing and.. other things that had happened at the very beginning of their relationship. And Phil felt restless. As he was nearing his thirties, he dreamed about having a family more and more. But at the same time he couldn't imagine a life without Dan constantly by his side. Who else was going to stop him from adopting a hundred cats and puppies and starting a hamster breeding business? And Dan needed him. Who else would manage Dan’s life? Without Phil, Dan would probably release one video a year and start a militant Kanye West defense squad.

If Phil ever got a girlfriend, Dan would have to love her, no adore her, because he’d be around her all the time. Phil and his girl would only have privacy in Phil’s room, which made him claustrophobic even thinking about. And there was no way he would move in with her: the life of a YouTuber had a pretty weird schedule which was not at all compatible with a nine to five routine. And that was if he even met a girl. The girls at the bars he and Dan visited were not his type, nor Dan’s and usually they would just keep to themselves and their own group of friends when they went out. He’d want a girl like that Rumor from Teens React, but his age. Why weren’t there any girls like that for Phil? If Dan had been a girl, they’d probably already have three children. Chester Wolf Howell-Lester, he laughed to himself.

“Dan, I really want a girlfriend”, Phil said as they walked through their London neighborhood.

Dan was taken aback by the way Phil blurted it out, but he recollected himself and said “Well Phil, what’s stopping you? You’re a handsome guy, go get a girlfriend!”

Phil sighed. “I just have no idea how to get one. I’ve been single for so long, I’d probably do everything wrong on a date and that is if I even got a girlfriend in the first place”.

Dan laughed and put his arm around his best friend. “Phil, it really isn’t as hard as it sounds. If you show her even a fragment of your wonderful personality, she’s bound to fall for you”. Phil looked into Dan’s brown eyes with his own icy-blue ones. Dan’s mouth parted slightly as his eyes widened by the sudden confrontation.

“Really?” Phil asked desperately.

Dan seemed a bit flustered. “Well, yeah, why not?!” Phil walked along and Dan scuttled to catch up with him. “Phil, all I’m saying, is that you’re a wonderful guy and you deserve a girlfriend! I’m actually feeling pretty jealous already!”

“Why would you feel jealous of my non-existing girlfriend?” Phil asked.

“You know why”, Dan said, suddenly deadly serious.

Phil thought that they would never speak of it again. That was the only way they’d be able to remain friends, best friends, and not be weird about it. But as the sun was setting over London, rays of pink and orange light illuminated Dan’s face, and he looked at Phil, eyes slightly squinted against the sunlight, biting his lips ever so slightly. A frown stood on his forehead.

“Dan.. you’re joking, right?” Phil felt his mouth become really dry, and his heart started to beat in his throat.

“I’m not, actually. I know you’ve been thinking about getting a family, Phil”, Dan said. “And I’ve not been ready for family life yet, or so I was saying to myself. But look at what we have, Phil! Is there really any household you know of that is more harmonious than ours?”

“I need to sit down”, Phil said as he walked to a nearby bench.

“Phil, I’m sorry, I really thought you were going to bring it up too! I’m so sorry.. I know how hard it was on you, forgetting about ‘us’ in that sense…”, Dan sat down beside Phil and put a hand on Phil’s knee. “But I guess I just never really got over you after all. Phil, the first time we met… it was magical. And you know what? My life has been magical ever since.”

It wasn’t dark yet, but the street lights had switched on. Two beautiful twenty-something guys sat next to each other on a bench, in an empty street, maybe there was a cat under a car somewhere but that was it. Nothing but the slight breeze and a soft sobbing was to be heard.

“I don’t want to lose you though, Dan”, Phil said through his tears. “You’re only 23. What if you change your mind about me in a few years? Can we go back to being friends then?” Dan embraced his best friend.

“Do you really think I would EVER leave you, Phil? Even if Jennifer Lawrence asked me out on a date, I’d probably be too awkward to reply. You are my life, Phil. Why would I ever want it any other way? Honestly I’ve been scared lately, I noticed you were thinking about this. I don’t want to lose you either.”

“I love you so much”, Phil said through Dan’s leather jacket, in which he’d buried his face.

“I love you Phil”, Dan said. Phil looked up into the eyes of the guy he loved so dearly. His soul mate. The guy he did everything with, and never got bored by. Dan had misty eyes too, but still managed his danisnotonfire smirk. Phil felt drowsy. He didn’t register the world around him anymore. He just saw Dan’s face coming closer and closer to his own. Suddenly he felt the warm, slightly chapped lips he hadn’t felt in five years. It was electric. Phil breathed in Dan’s aftershave, and Dan squeezed Phil’s collar tightly and tugged it towards him so Phil couldn’t escape the kiss, even if he’d wanted. But he didn’t want to stop kissing Dan, ever.


End file.
